Mr. Bill George Presents

People Suck

In Society on May 26, 2009 at 12:33 AM

Elaine: I will never understand people.
Jerry: They’re the worst.

Something struck me the other day: People suck.

While I’ve known this fact for a long time it is good to see that I’m slowly bringing others down with me. My lovely girlfriend, we’ll call her Mrs. X, is getting the same bitter temperament that I have had for quite sometime. Yesterday we pulled into a local convenience store for a beverage when one of the local hillbillies decked out in full Harley-Davidson garb lighting up a Marb red commented on her car, and what nice shape it was in. Once out of earshot, Mrs. X leaned in an said to me, “Did I just get hit on because of my car?” (a 1991 Toyota Camry mind you). I had to say yes. And that hurt me. I ask you: isn’t there be a 6 tooth minimum when trying to hit on a girl? And I answer: a resounding ‘Yes.’

But, the incident has inspired me. I have come up with 4 (I like even numbers) things that I hate about people.

1. Courtesy (or lack thereof)

People have no sense of what common courtesy is anymore. Taking screaming brats into a nice restaurant, texting/talking on the phone in unacceptable situations (toll booths, drive throughs, etc), not waving when you let them pull out in front of you, acknowledging you when you hold a door et al. The little things. It’s a big world out there folks, don’t think that it all revolves around you.

2. Driving

The rules of the road aren’t what they used to be. I have already covered a few of these in the previous section but it deserves a part of the list all for itself. Have you ever played this tug of war? You and another motorist arrive at the same parking space but you got there noticeably sooner. The other person take this as a challenge and bangs through the gears to get into the space. It’s a parking lot, not the NHRA Nationals folks.

Also: not using blinkers, leaving high beams on, driving too slow, tailgating, drifting within lanes, stupid vanity license plates. People always seem to know just how to get your blood boiling on the road and it’s almost inescapable. At one point I got so frustrated with a woman who couldn’t operate her blinkers correctly I accused her of being a whale and her flippers were the cause of the problem. When my girlfriend pointed out how callous I was, I admitted maybe it wasn’t her flippers…it was the big horn coming out of the front of her face, that Narwhal.

3. The Internet

People on the Internet are the worst (this blog excluded obviously). Particularly on YouTube,, and Really, anywhere that someone who sits in their dimly lit house all day waiting to start an unnecessary argument can find you.

YouTube made me realize that no one is accepting of anything in this world anymore. commentators can take the simplest article and turn it into the most torrid maelstrom of hate, religion and politics that you will ever see. ESPN isn’t that far behind.

You may say, well these people are just trying to seem crazy to make their point heard. I realize that, but at what point does arguing what Bible verse points out that Democrats are the anti-Christ seem a little bit juvenile?

4. Inside the Box

Remember that phrase “think outside the box”? Guess what, it’s actually a really good sentiment to live by. People in today’s world don’t strive to try new things. “Aerosmith is the best band ever I don’t care what you say and I’ll never listen to anything else.” “Spiderman is way better than Batman.” “Kix are better than Cheerios.”

You name it, someone has passed premature judgement on it. People strive to classify every single facet of their lives. Endless ranking, rating, and competing. Can’t we all just try and do something different?

I realize that this is only a small sampling of reasons why people suck. Please leave comments and add to this list. A wise man once said “Yes we can…find the root cause of human annoyance and stupidity.” –Barack Obama and the_skeptic.

  1. You’re corrupting your girlfriend :[ But she’s so nice! What have you doneeeeeeee. Haha ;]

  2. you do realize this isn’t my post right? i don’t write everything here, i have contributors. you can tell from the name above the title. this was written by ‘the skeptic’ who isn’t me. just clarifying.

  3. Ohhh snap I didn’t even notice that & I usually do. Haha ah well whatever :]

  4. If I wanted to hear about the idiosyncrasies of bad drivers, I should bust out my old VHS tapes of The 9th Annual Young Comedians Special, 1985.

    • Is there a way to contact Blogger.Com penslraoly to find out when the problem will be fixed. I cannot post at all. The problem started five days ago when it became difficult to download pictures. Now I cannot even get to the point to post or edit. I just need to know how long they are expecting it to be down since I publish a daily blog.

  5. John Gabriel’s Greater Internet Dickwad Theory :

    normal person + anonymity + audience = total dickwad

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