Mr. Bill George Presents

My Genius Idea

In Comedy, Technology on May 12, 2009 at 11:59 PM

So the other night I was struck with what could possibly be a fantastic, albeit ridiculous, idea. It all started when I had knocked back a few with some friends in what can only be described as a colloquial situation. We were sitting around playing the mini-games found within Pokemon Stadium 2 for Nintendo 64 when I felt my proverbial “seal” start to break. So, after the round was over, I made my way to our fetid bathroom.

What happened from then on is what you might expect to happen, I prepped, aimed and let loose my swollen bladder. But as I coated the inside of the bowl with my lemon stream I was stricken with said genius idea.

Now picture a product, a product that is thin, adhesive on one side, battery powered (maybe solar though, gotta go green after all), waterproof, touch sensitive, and that contours to one half of the inside of your toilet bowl. Now the device is segmented into 8-10 touch sensitive columns, all programmed with a different musical note to play whenever the touch-sensitive pad is “interacted” with. Basically what I’m getting at is a touch sensitive abomination of a keyboard that you stick in your toilet bowl and piss on for entertainment. Wouldn’t that be great?

At first thought I was amazed that my mind had percolated such an idea and wondered why I hadn’t seen anything like it. Surely this is something that would be seen on the shelves of your local Spencers.

However, upon further thought, I started to see the flaws inherent in the idea. It is possible that such a device would promote excessive splattering, be seen as ridiculous, and/or would leave customers dissatisfied when they had to change the batteries (not if it was solar powered though!)?

No product is without its flaws, however, and knowing that I can say that I would feel confident in my purchase of a “Pee-Board” (patent pending) for use in my bathroom. Now would you readers (women urinators excluded sadly) feel a sense of glee if whenever you peed you made sweet, beautiful melodies? Or would you shake your head in maturity?

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  1. sad thing is… i think i’d totally dig that.

  2. YES MATT!! and we can play feathers and engrish bwudd too!!

    – Ivan Omar Cordero

    • Thank you Christine glad you like the video too. Chino Hills is an amazing place and if/when you are ready to begin your home scareh here I am happy to help. As always, happy to answer any questions about the city..anytime!

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